Skip to main content

For Brian, on our 5th Anniversary




Five years ago today, I married the greatest man on Earth. Despite the cliché, Brian has genuinely earned this title again and again in the past ten years that I have known him. I am one of the lucky women who married her best friend. And while we have our moments of stress, disagreements, or the feeling that all romance has disappeared with the advent of parenting, we are still madly in love with one another. Those days of hours-long phone conversations, flowers, and fireworks have been replaced by a steady comfort that I think we both prefer. It can be exhausting to feel so passionate all the time. Our rock-solid relationship has become second nature. We know each other so well that I can finish his sentences and he can read my feelings with a quick glance. And our dreams for the future together are founded upon dedication, compromise, and a good sense of humor. Brian is good at making me laugh, especially when I'm taking life far too seriously. And this year has been the strongest test of our marriage thus far; fortunately, we survived it relatively unscathed. Brian is a devoted father, loving husband, and all-around amazing man. Here’s why:

  1. He sees me as his equal.
  2. He cooks well and often.
  3. When he gets home from work, the first thing he does is give me and the kids a hug.
  4. He lets me pick the music on road trips.
  5. He watches the kids without complaint so that I can go to book club, happy hour, dinner with girls and doesn’t tally them up so that he gets his fair share of outings in return (but of course he gets his fair share of outings without having to ask, because I am also a kickass wife).
  6. His beard is better than yours.
  7. He makes the coffee every morning even though he rarely drinks it.
  8. He can fix virtually any problem with the house or the car and actually takes satisfaction in solving an especially tricky issue.
  9. He brews his own beer.
  10. He listens, even when I don’t deserve to be heard.
  11. He has seen the world and is still willing to settle down with me.
  12. He’s smokin’ hot.
  13. He knows how to change a diaper, bathe a newborn, and swaddle with ease.
  14. He has watched all the Harry Potter movies 8 gagillion times without complaint.
  15. He gives me shit if he catches me reading trashy gossip magazines, even on vacation.
  16. He gets up with Atticus on Saturday mornings so that I can sleep in, even if I insist that it’s my turn to do it. And when I drag myself out of bed with morning breath and disheveled hair, he’s still willing to give me a kiss.
  17. He tells me I look pretty every single day.
  18. He plays a mean guitar.
  19. He’s not afraid to cry.
  20. He’s very good and kissing owwies.
  21. If you give him a hammer, nails, and some scrap wood, he can build virtually anything.
  22. He makes the best breakfast tacos.
  23. He will never stop dreaming up elaborate futures for our family that change on a weekly basis. According to his plans, we will someday own a plot of land and live off the grid in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina, travel the world with kids in tow, live in Barcelona for a year while brushing up on our Spanish, and sail the Caribbean in a modest catamaran.  
  24. He lets me rage or cry or laugh hysterically without judgment. 
  25. He loves me even at my worst.

So here’s to Brian, my best friend and partner in crime. I could list a million reasons why I love you, but it could never do justice to the man you are and the hope I have for who our sons will become. Thank you for being you. Thank you for choosing me.


And since it's our anniversary, it's only fitting that I add this gem in the spirit of nostalgia. To all those who were there, you're welcome.

Popular posts from this blog

An Open Letter to A Troll

Dear Troll, Since I started blogging about my son Quinn and his disability, I knew this day would come. There’s no shortage of trolls on the internet who hide behind the anonymity of a screen name with the intent to be cruel, and I’ve seen their hostility many times before. In fact, just last week, in the wake of a robbery at the Down Syndrome Association of Houston’s headquarters , in which $10,000 worth of technology was stolen, there was no shortage of ignorant comments on the news story reporting the incident. One user asked, “how will they learn to count to potato?” Another claimed that wasting computers on “retards” was stupid anyway and that the organization deserved to be robbed. These comments, while offensive, simply serve to showcase people’s hate-fueled ignorance and aren’t worth my time. I grimace when I read them, but realize there’s little to be done about such stupidity.  I don't want to make assumptions about you, but I can guess from your immaturity

So you just had a baby with Down syndrome. Now what?

Itty bitty baby Quinn If you’ve stumbled across this post, it’s likely because you are about to embark upon a journey you never planned for. I understand and remember that experience well. Learning halfway through my pregnancy that my son would be born with Down syndrome was like stepping into another world. I felt lost, isolated, and angry. I felt as if my life would never be “normal” again. I remember worrying that I would never be able to keep track of the different milestones, the doctor’s appointments, the therapy sessions. And to be honest, these things were difficult in the beginning because I didn’t know where to start. I also wanted someone to tell me the truth about my future; the internet is full of sunshine-and-rainbow accounts of raising children with Down syndrome, but I knew that couldn’t always be the case. Surely these parents were devastated by their child’s diagnosis and exhausted from the extra time a child with special needs requires, but I wasn’t seeing that

For My Fellow Humans

I love you all, fellow humans: similarities and differences aside. I love you for expressing your beliefs and wanting what’s best for everyone because it means that you love your fellow humans, too.  So let’s strive to be civil, supportive, and empathetic to the fears we all have. Let’s reference reputable sources when sharing information on social media and respect dissenting opinions by avoiding polarizing rhetoric. We are in this together and I will fight for you and yours regardless of whether or not we agree. Because you are my fellow human. And I am yours.  There’s an overwhelming spread of [mis]information right now, and it’s hard to know what to believe. There are myths masquerading as science and science discredited as political strategy. And every “side” is to blame. Is COVID-19 a political weapon? I don’t know. But I do know I’ll do my best to consider your stance, whatever it may be. And regardless of the origins or purpose of this virus (or lack of purpose if it’